The American Jingoist

In response to the reading level of the presidents’ speeches:

 

It’s not necessarily a sign of dumbness to write at an eighth grade level.

Getting to the point holds your audience.

My tech manuals are in 8th grade American English. Writing in the active voice
is my forte …. most documents I have written have zero or one percent passive
verbs.

My Ellis Island books averaged about a 10th grade English read. The Gettysburg
Address was 7th grade or 6th grade, but understandable for all time.

The old-timers used some flourishes and some allusions to classical figures in
history. This jumped their numbers. As did run-on sentences. And using the
passive voice.

Multisyllable words, like calling Stanley Ann Dunham aka Stan the Man a “bondage
submissive” or “pornography princess,” raise the reading level by comparison to
“BO’s whore mom” or “pert upturned bottom” or “Spank me, mistress. Harder!”

Not using words like “sequestration” or “Benghazi” or “Operation Fast and
Furious” holds down reading level too.

And making speeches depends on your audience.

BO’s speechwriters need to craft him messages that fit on a teleprompter screen
so he can tell his people, “Uncle Sugah gonna grab him some from workers to
support you. How them Obamaphones working for you?”

And he has to speak off the cuff (lower grade level than “extemperaneously”) to
tell Biden, “Pull your thumb out of your ass.” or “Madam Secretary, pull that
broom you’re flying …..”

Clinton had to say, “Hey, punkin, I want a shepherd”s pot pie and a piece of
ewe.”

Bush 41? “Read my lips. No new taxes.” and “New world order.”

Bush 43 ? “Port security. Dubai.” The picture in “Green Eggs and Ham” showing
the locomotive in the ship’s smokestack to illustrate the port security..

Jimmy Carter? “New-key-ar power. Three Mile Island. Billy, don’t pee in public.
I have often committed lust in my hand.”

Tricky Dick: “I am not a crook.”

LBJ: “Pedro, start a BBQ with these illegal ballots. Then wade back home where
you belong.” “Aim high, Lee Harvey. JFK might be stooping to cop a feel.”

Different strokes for different strokes.

Speaking small allows BO to think he’s dressing down children, This also leaves
him gray matter to craft lies and excuses on the fly.

But it does raise the length of his nose. And maybe for Michele that’s a good
thing.

It leaves her something long enough to grab and lead him by.

Shame on you dirty minds!

-Kev